A Pietist’s Very Holy Ode to Uno
Uno, Uno that Innocent game,
We take cards away but it is a game just the same,
To play and to win is the point of it all,
It is one small step to a gigantic fall,
To “Skip” and to “Reverse” is mean so they say,
But isn't it mean to play rather than pray?
The time spent in frivolity is lost forever,
Scripture not memorized is tragically gone, time to be recovered- NEVER!
Teaching minds while they are young,
That time can be wasted with frivolous fun,
Better to burn those death dealing cards,
Than play rather than pray- and become spiritual retards,
Uno, Uno, that Innocent game,
So says the devil with a very sly grin,
Better to go all the way and drink a bottle of gin,
Because sin is sin and it is all just the same,
Innocence lost through a devious death dealing game,
First comes Uno, its no problem they say,
Then comes Blackjack, My Hope is for 21 today,
Then comes Poker, its all in good fun,
Then its to the bus for Foxwoods my feet will surely run!
Uno, Uno that Innocent game,
I would rather see you burn,
Than take my death dealing turn,
Oh, those poor wretched deceived wicked debauched wanton lazy frivolous slackers,
Wanting to play rather than pray- what odious spiritual hackers!
Oh, that the children would rise up,
and rebuke Mom and Dad,
Who would incite such ruin,
and go to bed glad,
It is time to crusade, and hit the floor running,
Storm the Walmarts, Targets, those dealing consumers this death wielding game,
As the devil would treat us lets treat them the same,
Lets burn and pillage and show them our zeal,
Our Innocence, and Religious superiority, You will not steal!
If you love god, you will hear our call,
Uno, Uno, that worm eaten game,
Your time has come, incur your blame,
I hate you, I hate you, in a high holy way,
Into ashes you will go, and plead to god you will stay,
So light up the matches,
there is no time to lose,
Wake up the lost from their play drunk snooze,
Offer to god a sacrifice of praise,
As we smell the plastic smoke,
and peer through the haze,
What Liberty! What joy! What high holy fun!
In circles we will dance, to our grim god we will run,
What could be better,
Than to take such a stand,
A world rid of Uno, now THAT will be grand!
By,
Mark( the humblest sinner that I personally know of) Skillin